We went to visit Momma Tofu at her home for her to explain the culture of the Xhosa women, and have a home cooked Xhosa meal. Momma Tofu is 95 years old, and speaks to any groups of people that want to learn about the Xhosa culture. First, she had us sit and listen about the traditions of becoming adults for males and females. Then she proceeded to go in depth about how a man should propose to a woman, and what she should say to him. She said that a woman should never just give into a man because he said he loves her. She needs to find out where he lives, if he works, and if he can actually support her/their future children. My favorite thing she said was, "when a man says I love you, you say what is your love about?" She also told us that when a man wants to marry a woman, he needs to have at least 18 cows, because that means he has worked for something in his life. She also told us about how the older women check if a girl is a virgin. They will take a group of girls away from the village, and make them jump. If they don't jump high enough, or with enough energy, they are not a virgin because they were too busy the night before. When she was done explaining the different stages of marriage, and other things that women do, we got to buy some jewelry from the local women. I got two necklaces that they hand made, and a nice little bag.
Then she fed us (in the picture below), and a bunch of little girls sang and danced for us. It was an amazing way to really experience the culture, and meet the local women.
Words to live by - I can just see asking any U.S. suitors how many cows they own!! A girl has to have her standards.
ReplyDeleteWords to live by - I can just see asking any U.S. suitors how many cows they own!! A girl has to have her standards.
ReplyDeleteThis is a fantastic story's, Maggie. I remember when I went to Poland and had a similar experience where we had an authentic Polish meal in a home in one of the villages. Just the kindest giving caring people and you really do get a first hand experience of how non Americans live - it is both humbling and inspiring. Love, Rita
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